Posted on April 19, 2022 in Divorce

You got married to your spouse just over a year ago, and things seemed to be going well. At least, that was the case until you came across their internet history.

After finding out that your spouse was involved in forums and chats you didn't agree with, you had to seriously consider if you could stay with them. To you, their behavior is unacceptable, and it's not something you knew about before you got married.

Is it too soon to file for a divorce?

While a divorce is a possibility, you may want to think about other options first. Talking to your spouse about what has upset you, for example, could resolve the problem if they're willing to stop that behavior. They may also be able to give you more information, and what you saw as a negative might not be as bad as you thought.

It's also possible that talking to your spouse will make it clear that you have a difference in opinion on a major, deal-breaking topic.

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 Posted on April 06, 2022 in Child Custody

There are not many things as contentious as child custody during the divorce process. Even in the best of circumstances, the thought of having restricted access to your children can be unsettling, to say the least. This explains why more and more divorcing couples are opting for joint custody.

Joint or shared custody is an arrangement where divorced or separated parents share their children's decision-making responsibilities. Joint custody offers immense benefits to the parents and the children in question. However, like any other custody arrangement, joint custody does have its share of challenges.

Here are two things you can do to have a successful joint custody arrangement.

Put kids first

It is important to acknowledge from the onset that divorce has everything to do with you and your ex and nothing to do with your children. As such, it is imperative that you keep your child's best interests ahead of your own. And part of putting your kids' best interest first involves avoiding situations where you get the kids to side with one parent over the other. A good rule of thumb would be to avoid speaking ill of your ex in front of your children or using them as pawns in your conflicts. Always assure your children of both parents' unwavering love and commitment to be there for them at all times.

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 Posted on March 21, 2022 in Family Law

A Virginia divorce will shake up most areas of your life. It will change your schedule and what assets you have access to. It will also affect when you spend time with your children.

If you share ownership of your house with your spouse, then a divorce will also impact where you live. For many people in Virginia, their home is the most valuable thing that they own. Often, people think they must keep the house when they divorce in Virginia.

Do you want to retain your home after the divorce?

You don't have to keep the house to retain your share of it

Maintaining a home on your own isn't easy, and neither is qualifying for a mortgage based solely on one person's income. You will likely need to refinance if you intend to keep the marital home, so you need to look realistically at your finances to see if staying in the home is realistic.

Virginia's equitable distribution laws allow you to claim the value of the property that you share with your spouse even if you don't ask to keep that asset. There is no all-or-nothing approach, especially with major assets. Instead, the value of one asset helps balance out other property or debt.

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 Posted on March 11, 2022 in Divorce

One of the most challenging aspects of a divorce is settling matters related to child custody. Personal disputes between spouses can often cloud the judgment of both parents, even though they have the best interests of the child at heart.

Difficult as it can be, it is important for both spouses to try and put their personal grievances to one side during custody negotiations. Staying on point during custody proceedings can be trying, but the following tips could help.

Organization is key

It is very easy to become consumed by the emotional turmoil of a legal separation and custody case. Nonetheless, it is important to try and put this to one side and focus on what you can control. One of the most productive things you can do is keep an organized account of what is going on. You may wish to log interactions with your spouse, both in terms of the more productive and contested conversations. You could jeopardize your case by flying off the handle, whereas remaining composed and carefully planning your next steps will show the court that you are a conscientious parent.

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 Posted on February 23, 2022 in Child Custody

One of the things you will need as a divorcing parent is a parenting plan.

Whether a Virginia family court orders one or you decide to create one yourself, a parenting plan comes with several advantages. Examples of these advantages include:

• Sets a consistent schedule for parents and children
• Helps you and your co-parent prepare in advance for events and holidays
• Promotes communication and cooperation between co-parents
• Increases security and stability for children of divorce

As you probably know, it is often hard for divorcing parents to agree on matters involving their children. However, it is usually worth the effort it takes to iron out equitable child custody and parenting plans.

Negotiation tips to consider

Perhaps the most critical tip when negotiating acustody pr parenting plan is to know what you are talking about in the first place. If you do not understand thechild custody laws in Virginia, your final agreement might turn out to be worthless or legally invalid. Five more tips to consider using during your negotiations include the following.

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 Posted on February 14, 2022 in Divorce

You can legally get married when you turn 18, but it is a risk. Studies have repeatedly found that those who get married at a very young age get divorced at a higher rate than those who wait. In fact, there are those who believe that the most stable marriages happen when people wait until they're in their early thirties.

Have you ever wondered why this happens? What is it about getting married at such a young age that means it's not going to last?

You may feel like you're missing out on life

One potential problem is that you or your spouse could begin feeling like you're missing out on all the fun that your friends are having. You're just home trying to make a difficult marriage work. Everyone else is talking about traveling and dating and having new experiences, but you don't get to do all of that. It can make you feel alienated and alone.

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 Posted on February 10, 2022 in Child Custody

No matter how carefully you try to craft the terms of your custody arrangements, you will eventually need to change them. As your children grow and mature, their needs and daily schedules will change as well.

Virginia law allows you to modify an existing custody order after a change in family circumstances. Recognizing when your family needs a modification to its existing custody order can help you minimize co-parenting conflict.

When either parent changes jobs

Working a different shift or having more job responsibilities to take home after work can affect how someone parents and what time they can commit to the children. If either parent changes professions or jobs, that change may justify a custody modification.

When the children reached school age

The custody demands of a preschool child will be very different than the needs of a grade school child.

Both parents may need to make changes to their weekly schedules and therefore to the parenting plan when the children start school and no longer require daycare. Parents will have to address everything from who picks the kids up when they are sick to who takes the children over school breaks.

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 Posted on January 28, 2022 in Divorce

Are your instincts alerting you that something is amiss in your marriage? When you live with your spouse, you're familiar with their daily routines and how they act and react in most situations. Lately, you get the feeling that something is a bit "off" with your spouse.

While you hate to consider it, you start to suspect that your spouse might be having an affair. Below are some signs that could confirm your suspicions.

Your spouse periodically "goes dark" and is unreachable

There can be legitimate reasons why someone is unable to text back or answer the phone. But if this happens frequently during times when they should be available, that might be a red flag.

Your spouse suddenly improves their appearance

Joining a gym, dieting or otherwise improving one's appearance can be a good thing. But it can also mean that your spouse is trying to appear more attractive to someone else besides you.

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 Posted on January 13, 2022 in Child Custody

Keeping it real, divorce is hard on families, and it's often hardest of all on the children. It can even be more challenging for a parent to retain strong bonds with their kids when that parent lives in another city or state.

Those situations can arise from many circumstances. New jobs, remarriages or other reasons can put distance between a child and their much-loved parent. Then, they must find ways to remain connected with one another.

Welcome to virtual visitations

When parent and child are apart, virtual visitation can become the next best thing to being there. It's the responsibility of the parent to find ways to sustain and enhance their relationship with their child in lieu of being a frequent physical presence in the child's life.

Below are some activities they can share with their kids across the miles:

• Facetiming over the phone or computer. Thanks to technology, parents and children can be virtually in touch every day. By setting a specific time to "meet" online via Zoom or Skype or Facetiming on the phone, the child can give daily updates about their life.

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 Posted on December 27, 2021 in Divorce

If you're preparing to divorce in the new year, you may have some concerns about how it will affect your work - particularly if you go to an office or other workplace every day. For many people, it's a relief to focus on work rather than the myriad decisions and concerns that surround their divorce.

However, it can still be difficult to navigate what's happening in your life and maintain your professionalism and commitment to your job. Let's look at a few things that will help.

Tell your manager about the divorce

Even if you aren't close enough to anyone at work to tell them about the divorce, your boss needs to know. You don't have to - and probably shouldn't - share too many details. However, you may need to take a little time off at some point to deal with legal matters or childcare issues. Don't spring the news on them only when you need to leave early or take a morning off.

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