Posted on November 29, 2022 in Divorce

Parents who divorce when their child is a toddler often think that they really aren't going to be impacted very much by the change in their family. However, just because they can't express their thoughts and worries as effectively as older kids can, that doesn't mean they don't notice all the changes.

A toddler's world is still fairly limited, so they will notice that their parents aren't together with them as much, that they're spending time alone with one parent in a new home and that maybe a grandparent or someone else they know is taking care of them more. All of these things are big changes for them.

Explaining divorce to a toddler

Don't assume that you don't need to have "the talk" with your toddler about what's going on. You just need to explain things with words and ideas they understand. They just need to know that the two of you won't be living together any longer, but you will still both be taking care of them (assuming that's the case) and that you both love them and will continue to be their parents. It's also wise to reassure them that this has nothing to do with them or anything they did.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on November 11, 2022 in Child Custody

In a divorce where children are involved, parents usually come to some kind of co-parenting custody agreement. Parents will, typically, work together to decide what's best for their child including where they're schooled, what their diet includes and if they perform any religious activities. Additionally, parents will work out a schedule so each parent can spend time with their children, which may work around schooling and work.

Some co-parenting plans don't work out, however. A divorce may have been caused by constant arguments, negligence and abuse which can continue through a child custody order. When this happens, parents may need to consider if they're going to continue a co-parenting plan or negotiate for a parallel parenting plan. There's more you should know:

Parenting without conflicts

A parallel parenting plan works much like a co-parenting plan. Both plans give parents responsibilities and obligations to keep the best interest of their children in mind. The difference, however, is that a co-parenting plan has both parents working together and a parallel parenting plan works to reduce difficulties between parents.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on October 28, 2022 in Divorce

During your marriage, you and your in-laws got on very well. The union of you and your spouse meant that you were part of an extended family. Now that you and your spouse have decided to go your own way, this dynamic has been turned on its head.

Your in-laws are barely civil to you anymore and they are trying to interfere with divorce proceedings. What can you do in such a scenario?

Stay composed

Your in-laws might be looking to get a reaction out of you, and if they get the desired effect, it's only going to make matters worse. Try to remain composed and approach the pivotal aspects of your divorce in a business-like manner.

Directly, your in-laws don't have a say in negotiations, so stick to the topic at hand and focus on settling matters with your spouse. Remember, it's likely that your in-laws are just trying to be in the corner of their child, and you would probably feel the same way in their situation.

Find that common ground

There are numerous things that you and your in-laws disagree on, but there is one important issue that you feel the same way about, the best interests of your child. Your in-laws love their grandchildren, there's no denying that. You feel the same and all parties just want what's best for the kids. Finding that common ground can help to smooth things over.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on October 13, 2022 in Child Custody

Parents have to discuss many details when creating a child custody order. You and your co-parent may need to consider who picks your kids up from school or what kind of diet they need. A custody agreement is all about the well-being of your child, but it also helps parents have more control over how their child is raised - and who is raising them.

One clause that may be included in a parenting plan is the "right of first refusal." Is this the first time you've heard about this term? Here's what you should know about why you should consider it:

Entrusting your child to a babysitter isn't easy

Your co-parent may work odd hours or attend night classes, leaving your child at home alone for several hours. When this happens, your co-parent likely has someone there watching your child, but you may not know who that person is - or you may not like the person caring for your child.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on October 10, 2022 in Child Custody

Your first holiday season after your divorce may seem lonely, or it may seem very exciting. You no longer have to compromise about how you celebrate in your own home, which is often necessary for married couples.

Whether you look forward to bringing back your family traditions for your children or you feel a bit blue about being single for the holidays, you will still need to talk about the holiday season with your ex. If you proactively coordinate the three issues below with your ex, you will set the entire family out for a smooth and pleasant holiday season.

Your holiday work schedule

Although you may have a basic outline of custody matters for school breaks and holidays, it is important to talk about the actual details. The two of you need to discuss your individual work schedules and when the children will be off of school.

Openly sharing any secondary obligations, like your office holiday party or your children's soccer gift exchange, will also be important as you coordinate the overall parenting and childcare schedule during the holiday break.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on October 01, 2022 in Family Law

Many parents have to plan their child custody order around work and schooling. A parent who takes night classes may have a hard time scheduling to have their child over at night. Likewise, parents who work on-call jobs may not be able to see their children for long.

You may not realize this, but a parent with a disability may also have a hard time making a child custody order work. Here's what needs to be considered when the parenting plan is created:

Doctors appointments

People who have some kind of disability often have to regularly see their doctor. These appointments may be scheduled months or weeks apart. The time a parent spends at their doctor's may be impeding the time they see their child - this is just one of many things to consider when creating a custody order.

Medical treatment

Some people with disabilities have medical problems that cause them to seek emergency help and treatment constantly. Parents may need to consider how their child is cared for if they or the other parent suddenly need to be admitted to a hospital.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on September 15, 2022 in Firm News

What is gaslighting? It refers to psychological manipulation that causes the target to question their sanity. However, gaslighting is far from simple.

Those with narcissistic personalities commonly use gaslighting to discredit the target while improving their own credibility. However, some can display gaslighting behaviors without knowing what they are doing, especially during an emotionally trying divorce.

Common gaslighting behaviors

If you are unsure whether your soon-to-be-ex is gaslighting you, the fact that you are considering it makes it a valid concern. To help you firmly identify gaslighting, look for the following behaviors:

• Assigns blame for hardships or problems to you or outside factors-but they never blame themselves.
• Dismisses your feelings by insisting that you are overly sensitive or have no reason to feel a particular way.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on September 09, 2022 in Divorce

It is impossible to accurately predict all divorce cases. Many couples who split up never thought they would do so, and there were no signs from the outside that it was coming. There are also couples that stay together when everyone believes they're on the verge of divorce.

That said, statistically speaking, there are a few predictors of a divorce. It's important to know what these factors are so that you can understand how likely divorce may be for you.

Your parents got divorced

People with parents who got divorced may be more likely to get divorced themselves. This could simply be because divorce is now an example that they've seen in their own lives, so they're quicker to think of it than someone whose parents have not gotten a divorce.

You got married young

Getting married young can put a lot of stress on a marriage. It's often harder to make ends meet, and both people have a lot of growing up and changing to do together. For this reason, it's been found that getting married early - prior to 32 - makes it more likely that people will split up eventually.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on August 24, 2022 in Child Custody

Going through a troubled divorce usually means that both exes are on edge. Communication can often be tense, but it's still necessary if they have children together. There may come a time when you get a contentious message from your ex. Determining how to handle this might be challenging.

You have several options to consider when trying to determine how you'll respond to the message. Be sure you think about what's best for the children before you make your decision about what to do. Part of co-parenting is making sure that you don't let the tension between you and your ex impact the children.

Should you reply?

Whether you should reply or not depends on a variety of factors. If the message is directly related to the children, you may have to reply. But, if it's not about the kids, it might be best to just walk away. If you do decide to answer, keep it focused on the children.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on August 10, 2022 in Divorce

When you're going through a divorce, one of the things that can make it easier is going into mediation with your spouse. Mediation brings you together with a third party to discuss your options and to make sure you both have unbiased information.

Mediation can work well for those who are willing to work together. It can also be a good way to resolve minor disputes if you and your spouse are happy to hear some potential options to resolve them or get some guidance from a third party.

Is mediation necessary?

Mediation is not required in Virginia. In fact, by law, you don't have to go through mediation before you get a divorce like you might have to in other states even though you will go to a dispute resolution orientation session in some cases. However, mediation is still a good idea. It gives you an opportunity to work out problems you have with one another now, so you can avoid trouble in the future. You might also be able to keep your case largely out of court and make sure you and your spouse get more of what you want out of your marriage by saving time, money and effort with mediation.

Continue Reading ››