Posted on February 23, 2024 in Divorce

There are a lot of changes that come with divorce. Even if you wanted to divorce, you may still experience a range of emotions in the period immediately following the split. This might be especially prevalent during the first year.

Taking the time to think about how you want your new life to go might be beneficial during the year of firsts. These firsts are all the special days you must deal with as a single person. Holidays, for example, might be much different.

Find your support system

One of the most difficult challenges you must adjust to is not having another adult at home to talk about your day with. You and your ex may not have always gotten along, but you might have found it comforting to know that someone was there if you needed to vent or talk after a tough day.

You can combat this by having trusted friends and family members you can call or message at the end of the day or when you need an ear. These should be people who will share your joys and help you process your frustrations.

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 Posted on February 09, 2024 in Divorce

Divorce is a challenging process for all involved, often particularly for children who are caught amid their parents' separation. An essential aspect of safeguarding children's emotional well-being during and after a divorce is to ensure they aren't used as messengers between their parents.

Using children as messengers places an unnecessary burden on them, often causing confusion, anxiety and stress. They may feel caught in the middle by having to choose sides or betray one parent by communicating messages from the other.

Emotional impacts

The emotional well-being of children during and after a divorce is fragile. Using them as messengers can exacerbate feelings of insecurity and abandonment. They may perceive the divorce as their fault or feel they are being used as pawns in parental disputes. This can lead to self-esteem, trust and emotional stability issues, affecting their ability to form healthy relationships in the future.

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 Posted on February 06, 2024 in Divorce

Divorcing couples in Virginia often have a lot of questions about the future. They know they have to share their resources and debts, and they may be uncertain about what that process may involve. Virginia, like most other states, has an equitable distribution statute. If spouses go to court to divide their property, a judge looks over an inventory of marital debts and assets and learns about the couple's circumstances.

The judge then decides how to divide those resources and obligations in a fair or equitable manner. Almost all property and income acquired during the marriage is subject to equitable distribution in the event of a Virginia divorce. Retirement savings are often among the assets that contribute the most to someone's concerns about the future.

They may worry about needing to share their retirement savings and also about whether dividing the account might lead to penalties and taxes. Yet, those who utilize the right documents can reduce the risk of major retirement setbacks during a divorce.

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 Posted on January 26, 2024 in Divorce

In the midst of a heartbreaking divorce, the last thing you want is another battleground. However, for many couples (especially those without children), their beloved pets become unexpected sources of conflict. These furry, feathered or scaled family members hold immense emotional weight, and their fate can feel like the ultimate tug-of-war.

Before the court gets involved and claws (metaphorical or otherwise) come out, learn what you can do about your .

Can you get a pet custody order?

Unfortunately, no. As in most states, Virginia considers pets as personal property in a divorce — not dependents with legal rights like children. That means the court cannot award custody or visitation rights as they do with kids of divorce.

How are pets handled?

Since they are property, a family law judge has the authority to decide which of you gets ownership of the pets. Typically, courts make property decisions based on asset value and spousal contributions, such as helping a spouse achieve business success. But it works a little differently with living property like pets.

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 Posted on January 09, 2024 in Child Custody

When it comes to divorce cases and parental rights, the courts will sometimes identify a primary caregiver. This is the parent who spent the majority of their time caring for the child and helping to raise them on a daily basis. The parent may have been :

• Planning activities
• Teaching basic skills like reading or writing
• Taking the child to sporting events and extracurricular activities
• Buying clothes
• Preparing meals
• Helping with bathing and grooming needs
• Going to conferences with the child's teachers
• Taking the child to doctor's appointments

Essentially, the child may just feel more comfortable around this parent if they were more heavily involved than the other parent. Creating stability and security is important during a divorce, so the courts may consider how involved each parent was in the child's life previously.

Does this still matter?

It is true that courts are moving away from ruling on the grounds of a primary caregiver. It used to be that women were generally considered the primary caregivers and would be preferential when looking at child custody rights. But this can hinder the relationship between the child and their father, so modern courts are giving this less consideration and trying to split things up more evenly between both parents.

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 Posted on December 28, 2023 in Divorce

Infidelity in a marriage is certainly one of the main things that leads to divorce, but this generally refers to extramarital affairs. It's important to note that this is not the only way that it can take place. In some cases, couples will break up because of financial infidelity.

This can take many forms, but it is generally when couples begin lying to each other about money. Maybe one person starts taking on debt without telling their spouse. Maybe they're dishonest about how much money they earn. Perhaps they've been spending in a way that their spouse isn't aware of, such as taking money out of a retirement account to spend on trips, gambling, frivolous purchases, a drug addiction or something else of this nature.

Finances and divorce

When this type of financial infidelity happens, it increases the odds that the couple will get divorced. For one thing, it can create financial stress, which is often linked to divorce. The person who is being dishonest may have spent far more of the family's money than their spouse realizes, meaning they're not going to be able to make ends meet or maintain the lifestyle that they want.

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 Posted on December 14, 2023 in Child Custody

Seeking a custody order modification is a reasonable step toward ensuring the best interests of the child if the current arrangement does not seem to work as intended due to a substantial change in circumstances. It can seem like a daunting legal process, but it is not necessarily the case.

You can navigate with relative ease if you approach it methodically and with the proper guidance. Here is what you need to do.

1. Gather relevant evidence

It is crucial to keep meticulous records of any changes or significant events that necessitate a modification of existing custody orders. You never know when such evidence may come in handy. Remember, the court needs proof that the changes you seek are in the child's best interests and will not rely on hearsay or false accusations to modify the existing orders.

Whether it's your co-parent's relocation, changes in work schedules or the child's evolving needs and preferences, among other reasons, detailed documentation serves as strong evidence to support your case.

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 Posted on December 07, 2023 in Child Custody

The dynamics within a family are in a state of constant flux. The children may have a very different relationship with each parent at different stages of their development. Those dynamics will continue to shift as family members grow and circumstances change.

Oftentimes, the parents in a family or a Virginia judge drafting a custody order will try to factor in existing relationships and the preferences of the children when dividing parenting time. However, it is usually in the best interests of the children to maintain their relationships with both parents, even when they currently get along better with one parent than the other.

What can a parent do if their children refuse to spend time with them despite a custody order granting them parenting time?

The other parent should help

Each adult who is subject to a custody order must do their best to abide by the terms approved by the Virginia family courts. Parents need to show up on time for their visitation and make sure that the children are ready for time with the other parent in the family.

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 Posted on November 28, 2023 in Divorce

You and your spouse have decided to file for divorce and you both want to avoid a long and complicated process. Instead, you agree to settle the matter amicably and independently. This type of divorce is known as uncontested.

An uncontested divorce allows a couple who has mutually agreed to end their marriage to settle all the major issues involved in the process without drawn out litigation. This means that they can sign the necessary documents without having to go through the stress and expense of a divorce trial since they have resolved everything themselves or through mediation.

Obtaining an uncontested divorce in Virginia

According to Virginia code § 20-91 a couple who wishes to file for an uncontested divorce must have lived separately for at least one year, or six months if they have minor children. During this separation period, you and your spouse must establish yourselves independently. This means setting up individual bank accounts and residences.

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 Posted on November 12, 2023 in Child Custody

Parents sometimes assume that child custody is just going to be split in half. If they are not granted sole custody of their child, then they believe that those rights will be divided equally between them and their ex.

But this is not always the case. The court is going to do what is in the best interest of the child. This may mean that custody is not perfectly equal. For example, if it allows the child to stay in the same school system, then the court may rule that the child will live with the same parent all week - putting them closer to that school. They can then see the other parent on the weekends. This may not be perfectly fair, but it puts the child in the best possible position.

There are different types of custody

On top of that, parents need to remember that there are - physical custody, or parenting time, and legal custody, or decision-making power. These also don't have to be split up equally.

For example, the court may decide that it would be best for both parents to see the child, so they share physical custody. One parent at least has visitation rights and gets to spend some time with their child.

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