Whether you negotiated an arrangement with your ex or went to court for a judge’s assistance, your custody order is a reflection of what is hopefully going to be best for your children. It provides instructions on how you share time with the children and divide your responsibilities.
As you start adjusting to life sharing those responsibilities and splitting your time with the kids, you and your ex may reach a point where you agree to make changes to your time with the kids or the rules that apply to your custody arrangements. Although you can negotiate an arrangement, such solutions are risky.
You are vulnerable to enforcement actions
If you and your ex agree to change your custody arrangements a certain way, all you have is a verbal agreement to protect yourself. If they go back on their word, they could leave you in a lurch without child care or even try to get you in trouble for failing to show up for parenting time they agreed they wanted to take themselves.
If you agree about the need for a post-decree custody modification, you can request an uncontested hearing in the Virginia family courts. You may be able to quickly and easily make formal changes to your custody arrangements so that the two of you can continue sharing custody with minimal conflict.
Rather than expecting the best from your ex and risking consequences by making informal changes to your parenting arrangements, formal modifications will better protect you and reduce conflict. Updating your custody order can be an important step toward maintaining a positive relationship with your co-parent.